(Note #1: All comments and constructive criticisms are welcome and appreciated.

Note #2: Once again, all artwork is by Faith Desky.

Note #3: And finally, thanks to volunteer Literotica editor TheNyxianLily for her help with editing and story flow.)

The next few days after Sal’s shooting passed by without incident. Sal recovered quickly, keeping in bed and getting some rest as per Calley’s strict orders. Even when he was allowed to leave the medbay, he took things easy. Since his trade negotiations had concluded, he found himself with very little to do. He offered to help Alezanna with the welding of the Ravenfang’s hull, but she wouldn’t hear of it. She also eschewed Calley’s assistance, insisting the medtech keep an eye on the captain instead.

Calley knew that watching over Sal wasn’t really necessary, but wasn’t about to argue with the older woman. She kept him company while Alezanna completed the ship’s repairs. The Gynapsi was uneasy, but not because of her shipmate’s condition. She was still considering Daznee’s offer to stay with her. She’d originally decided to ask her crewmates about their plans for the future and if she fit into them. But after Sal’s injury, it had left her mind. Now, the question had returned but she didn’t want to ask it. With Sal recovering and Alezanna still on edge about what had happened, she felt the timing was all wrong.

She didn’t end up asking it, because Sal gave her the answer she needed without her bringing it up. The second day after Sal had left the medbay, he was cooking dinner for the crew as he always did. Alezanna had offered to help, but this time it was him who eschewed her aid. As the trio sat down to eat at one of the galley’s tables, Sal started to explain how much the crew’s share of the Palsidian trade tariffs would be bringing in.

“Gods!” Calley said in amazement. “You weren’t kidding when you told Yutag you’d be the richest man in the system.”

“When do I ever joke about starcred?” he asked rhetorically. “But this windfall changes things for us. We limped into this system two sub-cycles ago expecting to lose our shirts paying for repairs. Instead, we’re set to make a fortune thanks to Hoddard’s secret. So we need to talk about what’s next. In less than a cycle, we’ll have enough to settle down if we want to. Forget waiting ten cycles like we were planning, we can buy a farm damn near anywhere soon. The question is, where do we wanna go?”

Calley swallowed hard and stared at the food on her plate. Her appetite had left her. Sal’s question had made it clear. Whatever future he was planning, she was part of it. She should have been overjoyed, but she wasn’t. It was in that instant that she realized, deep down, she’d hoped his intentions were the opposite. If she hadn’t been a part of his plans, she could have accepted Daznee’s offer without anyone’s feelings being hurt. Sal and Alezanna would go off to live a life of happiness with their riches and Calley would just settle into a new career. She’d miss them, of course, but Daznee and everyone else would help ease that pain, as would setting up a new life.

But now it would be her decision entirely. And no matter what she decided, somebody would end up hurt. She suddenly found herself wishing she was still on Arrida, having never set foot aboard the Ravenfang. It was a ridiculous thought, she knew, but it still held some comfort for her. If she hadn’t been hired by Alezanna, she never would have fallen in love with her and Sal. And she never would have met Daznee and… what? What did she have with the Vottonian beauty?

Daznee wanted her to stay. Wanted her to share her bed again. Wanted to share her life with Calley. And Calley wanted that too. The warmth she felt when with her crewmates, the acceptance, it was what she felt when she was with the teal-skinned woman too. Her feelings for her friend had now taken as much importance in her heart as those she had for Sal and Alezanna.

And if only she’d stayed on Arrida, things never would have gotten so complicated.

As quickly as the thought entered her mind, she quickly dispelled it. It was a child’s lament, and she wasn’t a child anymore. Nor was she that shy, destitute young woman that had come aboard this ship so long ago. She’d grown up, and now she had the problems of an adult. Maybe not all adults had to make decisions like the one that she’d have to make, but here she was. There was no avoiding it. She’d have to decide.

She realized that neither Sal nor Alezanna were talking and returned her attention to the present. Both her shipmates were looking at her with concern. “Honey, what’s wrong?” the Bellixan asked her. “You were a billion kilometres away just now.”

“No, not yet, but…” she began and then took a deep breath before continuing. “The day of the shooting, in the morning, Daznee made me an offer. She invited me to stay with her. She thinks I could find a job here, and I think she’s right. Ever since we got here, no one’s hassled me for being a Gynapsi. A few people mentioned it, but not in a bad way. It’d be like if they told you you had green eyes or were tall,” she told her shipmate.

Neither of her crewmates responded to her declaration, so she went on. “I’d never thought of leaving the ship,” she admitted. “I had no reason to. Being hired on was the best thing to ever happen to me. And that was before I even became a partner. I don’t know if you’ll ever understand what it meant for me to be your crewmate. To be accepted, and valued, and cared about…”

She felt a surge of emotion welling up inside her and pushed it down. She had to explain to them what she was feeling and why she was feeling it.  “I fit in so well with you. And then we stopped being just crewmates. You included me in your love and, Gods, I don’t have the words to tell you how that felt. How it still feels. Every time I slip into bed with the two of you, I feel like the luckiest woman in the galaxy. Like somethig magical is about to happen. And it does! In my heart. I don’t take it for granted, and I don’t want to lose that feeling. But…”

Still, Sal and Alezanna said nothing. They just sat and listened attentively to what Calley was saying. Their expressions showed no emotion, just rapt interest.

“The night before Sal got shot, I spent with Daznee,” she confessed. “It was our first time together like that. And it felt… right. Comfortable. I was as relaxed with her as I am when I’m with you. She wants me to live with her and I wanna explore that. Explore my connection with her like I did with you. It’s crazy. When I’m with you, I don’t need anyone else. But I feel the same way when I’m with her. I hate the idea of losing you to be with her and I hate the idea of losing her to be with you. I wish I could split myself in two to make everyone happy but I know I can’t.”

She took another deep breath to calm herself down and then continued. “And now we’re getting ready to leave and I don’t know if I want to. I know what the future holds for me if I stay on the ship. I like that future. I want it. But what Daznee’s offering is attractive too. Not just being with her, but all our friends and having a career at a hospital or my own practice. That’s a good future too. Full of possibilities. Maybe not quite as clear as my future with you, but that’s exciting in its own way.”

She paused and then finished with, “So that’s where I’m at. Stuck between two destinations and not sure which I wanna go towards. I love you two, and I wanna be with you forever. But I wanna be with Daznee too and stay here.”

Silence descended on the trio. Calley didn’t know what to say next. She had dropped her gaze to the table but now forced herself to look at her crewmates again. Alezanna looked upset and was obviously fighting back tears. Sal, for his part, looked pensive.

“I knew this would happen,” the older woman said. “The galaxy discovered what we already knew. We couldn’t keep you hidden away forever. Now you have new possibilities ahead of you and you have to see what they offer. No one stays a spacer forever.”

“I suppose not,” Sal agreed while looking away. “And if you’re getting out of the life, this is a good time to do it.”

“I won’t need to take a share of the tariff starcred—” Calley began to say, but Sal interrupted her.

“You’ll get it anyway. One third of the profits after expenses was the deal we made, and we’ll stick to it. If you leave, Alez and I’ll split the proceeds of our future runs with just each other. But you were a member of our partnership when I made the tariff deal and you’re entitled to your fair share of it. The Gods know you earned it. You were fixing up the ship while neither of us were, and you saved my life. And don’t think I didn’t notice that two thousand suddenly appearing in the communal credit account. You told me how you earned it and you could have kept it for yourself. But you didn’t, and the transfer happened before you knew I got shot, so it’s not like you sacrificed it with a view on a bigger payday that was coming up.”

“He’s right,” Alezanna told Calley. “You’ve more than earned your share of that starcred. You saved his life. I’d give you my share of the deal for doing that if I thought you’d accept it.”

“No way,” Calley declared. “I was hired to be your medtech and I did my job. I don’t deserve a bonus for doing my duties. But, if you really wanna give me a present… any chance you’d be up to designing a few more outfits? My wardrobe could certainly use the update.”

“Done, but you’ll have to wait,” the raven-haired woman said. “I’ve already promised Yutag and Coslove outfits to thank them for helping save Sal. And he got shot in his best shirt, so I’ll have to make him a new one as well. And replace his vest too. Gods, Sal, why couldn’t you get shot in one of your usual rags? They’re so ugly, I doubt anyone would notice if they had holes and bloodstains.”

“Next time, I’ll negotiate in crappier clothes,” Sal promised her, “and I’ll bring my gun. Margraite’s advice about how I come across be damned!”

The three spacers shared a chuckle before Sal continued on. “Look Calley, I wanna be clear here. I don’t want you to go. I want you to stay with us forever. I love you. You know that, but that doesn’t mean I ain’t gonna tell ya. If you decide to stay with us, you’ll be a rich woman. If you decide to stay in Rangxu, you’ll still be a rich woman. If you wanna stop doing cargo runs and fighting pirates and living in a beat-up crate, I’ll be sad. But I told you on Ravona I could accept seeing you leave if you do it happy. That’s still true. Now until you make a decision either way, I’m gonna treat you like a member of this crew and like a woman I love. It’s the only thing I can do. I’m not gonna give you advice on what you should do ‘cause I’ve got way too much of a bias.” He turned to Alezanna and added, “And pet, I expect you to act the same way.”

“Can’t I ply her with promises of a complete wardrobe overhaul if she stays, Master?” the Bellixan asked.

“No,” he replied. “As attractive as that sounds, Calley’s not stupid. She knows what we both have to offer her. Even if we decide to settle down, it’s gonna take a cycle or so before the tariffs really start to pay off. So until then, our lives will be more or less what they’ve been since she showed up. She knows what to expect there.” He turned back to his younger lover. “Now you gotta weigh that against what Rangxu has to offer. Decide what’s the better fit. You’ve been exploring since we got here, which is what we were encouraging you to do for a while anyway. So it’ll be our own damn fault if you decide to stay in-system.”

Calley nodded as she listened to what Sal was saying. “For someone who didn’t wanna give me advice,” she observed, “you ended up doing it anyway. But it’s good advice. I have a lot to think about, but you’re right. I just gotta compare the two options and choose which one works better. I just wish I wasn’t hurting anyone when I make my choice.”

“Can’t help you there, my love,” Sal admitted. “As a matter of fact, I gotta make things worse. I gotta give you a deadline. Margie’s throwing a big fancy gala in five days. She’s insisting we show up as that’s when she’s gonna announce the trade deal with Palsidia. Maybe she’ll even give me a medal or something. So we’re staying that long but the next day, we gotta go. We may have gotten the ship fixed up on the cheap, but we gotta start making starcred again. I’ve already started looking into what we can buy and sell at a profit and there’s a lot of juicy deals available. We can’t really afford to ignore ‘em.”

“Okay, that’s fair,” Calley said. “By the sixth day, I’ll have to have made up my mind. Whether I stay here or go with you, you’ll know for sure.”

“Good,” Sal told both the women. “Until then, we don’t talk about settling down or our future plans. We’re doing another run and that’s as far as we’re looking ahead. We can discuss buying a missile rack for the ship some other time.”

Alezanna scoffed at the idea and the discussion turned to other topics. Possible destination points for their next runs, potential cargo, things of that nature. It was a little odd, as Sal normally planned out their trips himself and simply announced them to the crew. Calley wondered if he was trying to involve her in the decisions as a way to keep her tethered to the spacer life, but dismissed the thought as being too underhanded for Sal. And in the days that followed, she also saw him asking Alezanna for her opinion on the next run as well.

It was only a few days later that Calley and Alezanna discussed Sal’s behaviour. With the ship’s repairs complete, the Bellixan had thrown herself into making clothes for Yutag and Coslove to wear at the upcoming gala. The medtech, also facing an excess of idle time, was helping her shop for fabric one afternoon. It was while doing so that Alezanna admitted she was glad to be away from Sal as she hated seeing him in such a funk.

“I feel bad,” Calley confessed. “I can’t make up my mind about staying here or not. Sal’s trying not to pressure me but seeing him adrift like this…”

“You think it’s because of you?” her companion asked. “Well, I hate to shatter your illusion that the universe revolves around you, but it doesn’t. I’ve seen Sal act this way before. You haven’t because we’ve had great luck since you joined us, but Sal gets like this after a bad run. Not when we run into bad luck. If he lost his confidence every time a deal doesn’t quite pan out the way we hoped, he wouldn’t be able to be a spacer. Hells, he’d probably have curled up in the fetal position after Tayoel.”

“I sure wanted to.”

“I remember. But no, this is just something that happens when Sal thinks it’s his fault that things went bad. Like maybe he didn’t predict that our cargo would become worthless because he didn’t research the job well enough. Or because a buyer he thought was legitimate turned out not to be. Getting shot while he was unarmed rattled his confidence. Oh, he might say it’s Governor Madzen’s fault for telling him not to negotiate with a gun on his hip, but deep down, he blames himself for being blindsided.”

“So what do we do to make him feel better?”

“Let him make a few more deals. Once he earns excess starcred at some fool’s expense, he’ll feel better. That man was born to negotiate. He could talk the High Seer of Ravona out of her habit.” Alezanna grabbed a small bolt of cloth from the table in front of her. “What do you think of this shade of orange for Yutag? She seems to favour warm colours.”

Calley approved of the fabric and the two moved along with their shopping. When they returned to the ship, Alezanna got to work making clothes and Calley went out dancing with her friends. It was her first night out since Sal’s shooting and most of the group asked her about it. Calley had, weeks ago, mentioned her captain was negotiating with the Palsidians and the entire sector now knew about Hoddard’s shuttle being fired on. Of course, Calley didn’t tell them much about what had happened and leaned on Daznee and Yutag to help her deflect questions. Mitchewl asked if Sal had been negotiating aboard the shuttle when it had taken fire and if that was how he’d ended up injured. Calley didn’t want to lie to him, but didn’t correct his assumption either. If he wants to jump to conclusions, she figured, let him.

Deltai hadn’t joined them that evening so there was an even match of four women and four men in the group. Pyerick danced with Yutag and Mitchewl with Mix while Daznee paired up with Vijjah and Calley with Spiroo. The Gynapsi enjoyed herself all evening and thought about letting the gambler take her to his domicile for the night. But before he could make the offer, she realized she’d run into an unforeseen problem. She liked all the guys in the group and was interested in doing more than just flirting with them. But if she didn’t stay in Rangxu, she simply didn’t have enough nights left to sleep with each of them. She worried that if she slept with some and not the others, the latter woud feel slighted when she left. So when Daznee offered to take her back to her ship, Calley accepted.

She explained her problem to Daznee on the shuttle ride back from the club they’d gone to and the social secretary opined that her friend was making a bigger deal out of the problem than the guys would. However, it brought up the subject of Calley’s future. The spacer told her friend about how she’d have to decide in the next few days what that future was. The socialite did her best to avoid trying to influence her friend, but it was impossible. She wanted Calley to stay in Rangxu and couldn’t hide it. The Gynapsi surprised her companion by asking the Vottonian to take her to her home so thay could spend the night together again. Daznee didn’t need to be asked twice and soon the two were making their way back into Madzen’s bedroom.

They made love, but it was quite different from their previous encounter. Daznee started to act subservient to Calley again, and, this time, the Gynapsi and Vottonian discussed how to proceed a little more carefully. They worked out a safe word to use and discussed boundaries. It allowed the younger woman to more confidently embrace her Queen Calley persona. The teal-skinned beauty happily played along and the two didn’t end up using any of her sex toys. All they needed was their lips and fingers to pleasure each other. They were also both more relaxed this time compared to how impatient they’d been the last time. Which isn’t to say their lovemaking wasn’t passionate and intense at times. But neither felt any pressure to do more than simply have a pleasurable encounter. Which is exactly what they had.

As they both caught their breath after Daznee had performed cunnilingus on her lover, the two women were cuddled together. The socialite told Calley, “Y’know, if you’re really worried about offending some of the guys, I think I know a way you can give ‘em all equal treatment. Of course, you’ll have to keep an open mind.”

“An open mind?” Calley responded. “Oooooh, that sounds intriguing. What are you thinking of?”

“Well, the gala coming up is gonna happen on the holy day of Jennha, the fertility goddess. It used to be a special day for farmers back before they came to Rangxu and the planet was left untouched. But another aspect of Jennha kinda remains. Fertility doesn’t just mean something to those who grow plants. For women, it was regarded as a good day to conceive a child. And if a woman’s husband was having trouble knocking her up, Jennha wanted her to find an alternate.”

“Jennha sounds like she was a lot of fun at parties,” the medtech joked.

Daznee chuckled and continued. “I dunno how many she showed up to, but in ancient times, yeah, there were pretty wild ceremonies on her holy day. Nowadays, it’s been toned down a lot. It’s just a day where most people, even the married ones, get to kiss whoever they want and it doesn’t go any further than that. But some other people, well, they re a little more observant of the old traditions, y’know?”

“Like Pyerick maybe? This sounds like the sorta thing he’d know about.”

“It is, but Mix was the one who told me about it. It was last cycle, before we met Pyerick. So it was just the four guys and me, Mix, and Yutag. Four boys, three girls. We came back here after the gala and took a swim in the pool. Nobody had brought a swimsuit but nobody really cared. So after the swim, we dried off and went into the sitting room with the big couch. And that’s where all of us honoured Jennha the old-fashioned way.”

“All together in one room? And all at the same time?”

“Yeah. It was the only time we ever did anything like that. I mean, doing it all together. Normally, we pair off and are a little more normal in our hook-ups. But that night, we all were in a mood to do it with each other in a group.”

“Wow,” Calley said as she imagined the scene. “What about the fourth guy? Was one girl double-teamed?”

“We all were. Each girl, that is. We switched partners throughout the night so that each girl made love to each guy. And that means that each of us, at one point, had two partners at the same time for a while.”

“Ooooh!” the spacer said as she understood what the green-haired woman was telling her. She’d assumed, incorrectly, that the women had been with one lover for the evening, save for one who had two men to pleasure her. But now she realized her error.

“So if you wanna do it with the guys, well, you could do ‘em all in one night. Mix and Yutag have already told me they wanna have another night in Jennha’s honour after the gala. Pyerick knows about last cycle’s and he’s really excited about being part of this one. I dunno if you have any problems with this idea. I mean, it’s not for everyone…”

“I don’t think Jennha would approve,” Calley opined. “The goddess of fertility would frown on women fucking when they’re on the cocktail. Sex for pleasure would be more appropriate for the holy day of Heddner, the pleasure god. I dunno if you have him in your pantheon—”

“We do,” Daznee informed her. “Except it’s his female form and we call her Zimberlee. But it’s more or less the same deity.”

“Okay then. But that being said, I’m not against the idea. I’m just gonna make sure I use the right god as an excuse to fool around.”

“You’ll do it?” Daznee said, excitement creeping into her voice.

“Sure. With Sal on the mend, it’s been a little while since I’ve felt a man’s touch. I like being with you, Daznee. But sometimes, a girl needs a good ol’-fashioned cock inside her. Having five in me in one night scares me a little, but it’s been a couple of sub-cycles of new experiences for me. I guess one more won’t hurt.”

“It shouldn’t. But since you’ve never had two boys at once, make sure you tell Deltai that. When he’s with a girl and a guy, he likes to take her ass. Hells, sometimes he does it when he’s alone with a girl. But if you tell him to take it easy, he’ll listen. He’s not an asshole, just a guy who likes to fuck ‘em.” Daznee giggled at her own joke.

Calley was a little surprised at her friend’s revelation about the holovid insider, but not too worried. Since asses had been mentioned, she took the opportunity to drop her hands to Daznee’s and give her posterior a good fondling. Soon, the two women eased back into another round of lovemaking.

Calley thought the idea of making love to all five men in one night was an interesting one. She figured, if she’d decided to stay in Rangxu, it would be a nice way to “try out” each one to see if she was interested in pursuing a sexual relationship with any or all of them. If, on the other hand, she decided to leave aboard the Ravenfang, the night would be a sweet farewell to the men who had, in such a short time, become so close to her. Whatever her decision would be, the night of sexual revelry would be a good idea.

What surprised her was that Jennha’s Day came and she found herself still indecisive about her future. She had mulled over her options time and again, weighed the pros and cons of each one. But still, neither one seemed to outweigh the other. She knew she had to decide, but found herself unable too.

She was on the ship, getting ready for her first formal gala. She finally had an opportunity to wear the dress Alezanna had made and given her as a birthday present. She knew she should feel excited. But even as she slipped the dress on, she felt torn in two. The dress had been a gift from Alezanna, yes, but her underwear was the skimpy pair that Daznee had given her the preceding week.  Either way her decision would come down, the clothes were a reminder that she’d be abandoning someone she loved. It put a damper on her mood.

Just decide, dammit, she admonished herself as she moved across the room she shared with her crewmates. Calley sat down in front of Alezanna’s vanity dresser and looked at her reflection in its mirror as she brushed her hair. Laid out on the vanity were the cosmetics she’d bought on shopping trips with Daznee, Yutag and Mix. Alezanna had inspected each small bottle and instructed Calley on how to use it. It had been a sweet gesture on the older woman’s part. Alez had been quite serious of make-up’s importance to what she called “the art of being a woman”. Calley hadn’t been sure if she was being facetious or not at first, but realized how seriously her lover took a woman’s physical appearance.

The Bellixan was slipping on her stockings before she put on her own gown. Calley hadn’t seen her friend wear it yet, but knew it was light blue with white sleeves. The sight of the beautiful woman bending her legs to put on her stockings was, even after all the time they’d spent together, still enough to take the Gynapsi’s breath away. But as enticing as the view might be, it wasn’t enough to make her forget her impending decision. This could be the last time I see her like this, she realized, and the thought troubled her greatly.

She looked down at a pair of turquoise hollowed-out block heels. She suddenly couldn’t decide if she should put on the shoes or do her make-up first. She did neither. She instead thought about who’s heart she’d be breaking tomorrow. The more she tried to make a decision about it, the harder it became. Finally, she couldn’t bear it anymore. She stopped everything she was doing and let her arms hang limply at her sides as she began to shake. She was about to break into a round of hysterical crying.

Alezanna, however, was nearby and recognized the signs of her friend’s upcoming breakdown. It was too similar to what she’d seen in the shower after Palcon for her not to see Calley was in distress. The Bellixan sat on the padded bench and pulled the medtech into an embrace.

“It’s just a gala, Calley,” she soothed the frazzled young woman. “Nothing to fear here. You’ll look wonderful and have a great time.”

“It’s not that,” Calley told her as the tears started to flow out of her eyes. “I don’t want to leave. I want us all to stay in Rangxu forever. But I wanna be a spacer too. I wanna stay with you and Sal. And I wanna be with Daznee and my friends. I… I can’t decide, Alez. I tried thinking about it, but it hurts too much. I tried putting it off but now, it’s almost here. Tomorrow, I have to decide and I still have no idea what to do.”

“All right, I understand,” she said soothingly. “The solution is simple. Invite your friends to say goodbye to you tomorrow behind the ship. Sal and I will throw a net over all of them and load them into the cargo bay. Then we’ll leave and take them with us.”

Despite her sadness, Calley laughed at the absurdity of the idea. “Become criminals to avoid heartbreak?”

“Why not? I survived almost twenty cycles with a price on my head. I doubt Daznee’s kidnapping would lead to a bounty as high as mine used to be. And having some of your friends around might come in handy. Pyerick identifying the Ravenfang’s make and model helped out a lot with the repairs. If nothing else, the group could be useful picking up heavy objects.”

“Somehow, I don’t think that’s gonna work.”

“Maybe not. But you are a spacer, after all. Do you know what a spacer would do?”

“Leave. Spacers don’t stay in one place too long.” the Gynapsi said ruefully.

“You’re not wrong,” the tall woman admitted. “But in this case, I was gonna suggest what a spacer does when they approach a point where they can’t decide what course to set. They turn on the autopilot and let the point approach. Then, when it’s there, they know what direction they need to go.”

“So you’re saying I should—”

“Enjoy tonight for tonight. Make tomorrow’s decision tomorrow. Put it out of your head until then. There’s a Bellixan proverb that says ‘The morning light illuminates all things’.”

Calley took a deep breath to steady her nerves. “Good advice,” she decided.

“You’re welcome, and have a compliment as well. I’m very proud of what you just did.”

“What, freak out and cry?” she said as she wiped the tears away with the back of her hand.

“No,” Alezanna clarified. “Freaking out and crying before you put your make-up on. If you’d done it after, we’d have to redo everything.”

Calley chuckled and started doing her make-up as Alezanna went back to getting dressed. Once Calley was done, she was quickly distracted by the sight of her friend in the silver dress. The Bellixan looked absolutely stunning and quickly shooed the younger woman off her vanity to do her own make-up.

NEXT CHAPTER: Calley attends a gala.